1) We all know that Pesach is זמן חירותינו – What does Cheirus mean?
2) Are there four questions or five? The mishnah says כאן הבן שואל yet our children preface the Mah Nishtanah with טאטע... דער פיר קשיות – Sheilos or Kassyos?
3) הסיבה –Rambam 7.3 and the Rema 472.6 say we should recline throughout our meal at the seder. And although the ר' אבי'ה is brought that nowadays we are not used to this expression of comfort, it is quite clear that we only rely on this b’dieved – which means after the fact - once we already mistakenly ate or drank without reclining, we might not have to repeat, in certain cases. Cups 1,3, & 4 aren’t repeated because of the appearance of adding a 5th cup, and Afikomen is not repeated because it is forbidden to eat after Afikoman.
4) However, if one forgot to (or did not properly) recline by Motzi Matzoh, even if he already finished the entire seder and bentched, he would have to wash once again and eat matzoh reclining! (And according to some, the whole order may have to be redone, as the matzoh that was eaten did not count and the matzoh that one eats needs to have had the Hagaddah said over it!)
5) What is the source of such importance given to reclining? That it should even disqualify one’s mitzvah of אכילת מצה which is d’oraisa?
6) Additionally, the gemara pesachim 108a absolves women but states an אשה חשובה must recline. However it seems to be taken a bit unserious with our נשי חיל if it is done at all and how they perform the הסיבה if they do. It is a very serious question if they are absolved. The Rema writes לא נהגו because they rely upon the ר'אב'ה but it doesn’t seem well founded, and it may entirely disqualify their mitzvah of matzoh!
7) To understand the distinction between a simple woman or an אשה חשובה we really should examine what the reason is for the gemara to absolve women in the first place. The sefer אור חדש (a contemporary of the Noda B’Yehudah brought in the Kovetz Mefarshim) asks threefold regarding their exemption.
i) If it is because אימת בעלה עליה, does a women have more respect and fear of her husband than a son to his father? Yet a son must recline in the presence of this father!
ii) If it is because she is not accustomed to reclining throughout the year, neither is a pauper! And yet the poorest of Jews must recline!
iii) If it is because she is serving and not in a position to recline, even an actual servant does have to recline!
Based on these, his only solution is perhaps she is similar to servant, but a male server who actually reads the Haggadah and says Hashem took him out of mitzrayim, must recline in accordance with his own words. But a woman who (generally) could not read and just hears the Haggadah from her husband, would not have to lean.
8) This obviously does not apply to our women nowadays. So how could they not recline?
9) So let’s go to the source halacha for reclining.
Mishnah Pesachim 99b – ערבי פסחים סמוך למנחה לא יאכל אדם עד שתחשך. אפילו עני שבישראל לא יאכל עד שיסב.
10) The questions abound. Why doesn’t the mishnah say straightforwardly everyone must recline? Why is it written in the negative – not to eat until reclining? Why is the source and primary subject of this halacha a pauper? And why doesn’t the mishnah blend these two halachos together? “Erev pesach afternoon even a pauper may not eat until reclining”? This would include both the halacha for all to save their appetite and for all to recline?
11) It seems to be two separate halachos; One regarding erev yom tov’s appetite preservation until dark. And second, after nightfall, on yom tov, don’t eat without reclining.
12) In Shulchan Aruch as well it seems split. 471.1 - Make sure the table is set beforehand to enable a quick start. 472.2 – Set the table beautifully and prepare the seating in order to recline in the fashion of cheirus. The Rema then adds that even a pauper without cushions must recline on his bench. This does not seem to be a matter of preparation on erev yom tov but just practically, he must do so when he eats on yom tov.
13) Why does a pauper need to recline – especially if he does not have the ability to do so comfortably? The Rambam clearly says reclining is part of להראות את עצמו כאילו הוא יצא – (some suggest this is d’oraisa!) and a matter of comfort, and perhaps a pauper who cannot do so comfortably would be absolved. But although the mechaber clearly says to prepare comfortable הסיבה for the rich, the Rema clearly requires the עני to recline even without comfort. It seems that there is an additional factor to הסיבה expressed in the עני that although exists by regular people as well, it goes unnoticed. THIS may be the foundational reason for הסיבה and therefore the source halacha for הסיבה is expressed in the עני specifically. What is it?
14) (The B’er Moshe explains that the main Cheirus that occurred and that we celebrate, is spiritual and this is brought out in the lack of physical appearance of cheirus in the pauper’s reclining. Although in physical or financial status we are different, yet כולנו מסובים – we are all equal doing הסיבה as spiritually we all were freed from the spiritual slavery of Egypt to the freedom of spirit as עבדי ה' .)
15) The source mishnah for הסיבה has an interesting note from the מלאכת שלמה who brings another girsa – not עד שיסב with a kumatz and tzeirey, rather with a pasach and tzeirei. This suggests that the pauper is not reclining in comfort but must recline himself. This aligns with those that say he is required even when not in comfort. But why?
16) This attention to the very specific nuances in reclining led me to a whole new understanding of הסיבה. There’s an amazing Medrash Rabbah Shemos 20.18 on the beginning words of bishalach. ויסב א'... – מכאן אמרו רבותינו אפילו עני שבישראל לא יאכל עד שיסב – This is astounding. Hashem made a circuitous route for the Jews and from here Chazal say that we need הסיבה??? Some say this means that at that point Hashem caused the yidden to be able to eat in a leisurely manner as opposed to the “eat & run” manner in which they ate as slaves until now. But this remains astounding as this was either still the first day of the exodus or the following day. The passuk (shemos 12.34) says משארותם צרורות בשמלותם על שכמם and we are suggesting they sat down to eat proper meals and reclined?
17) However, there is an amazing Rashi and מזרחי here. הסיבם מן הדרך הפשוטה לדרך העקומה – Says the Mizrachi, Rashi is telling us that ויסב does not stem from the word סיבוב meaning to turn, but rather like ואתה הסיבות את ליבם (מלכים יח לז) which means a complete uprooting and change of heart. העתקה מענין לענין. This opens up entirely new approach to הסיבה for ourselves and may answer why the primary source case is the עני and why women may be absolved.
18) Another Medrash Rabbah (Shemos 20.11) sheds a bit more light. ולא נחם א' דרך ארץ - Hashem did not allow them to follow “Derech Eretz”. - the norms of the world. The derech eretz is that a master acquires a servant to carry, bathe, anoint and light the way for the master. Yet Hashem carried Klall Yisrael, bathed…lit the way… etc for the Yidden, His slaves!
19) The 15th of Nissan is a night of absolute change! It was the true night of ונהפוך הוא of Purim (and the first surprise of all, when Yakov was switched with Eisav).
20) The Aruch Hashulchan 472.3 quotes the famed ר' אביה but states that his reasoning that nowadays we are not accustomed to הסיבה , is all the more reason to REQUIRE reclining! To show how different this night is! He proves this based on the fact that reclining was not one of the four questions in the times of chazal, since it was more normal then. Additionally, the requirement of the pauper to recline, proves that not being accustomed to it is not a reason to be absolved at all.
21) Based on this, I would like to add that if the underlying meaning of הסיבה in not חירות as comfort (although it certainly is the main reason according to the Rambam and it also is n additional factor as well according to the Rema,) but as a change from the norms, then all the more so the pauper’s reclining is THE exemplary case that expresses the true essence of הסיבה more than anyone! This is why his example is the source halacha for leaning, because for him more than anyone else it is העתקה מענין לענין a complete change from the norms!
22) Perhaps we can now offer a novel idea as to why a typical wife may be absolved. For a typical עיקרת הבית with all the Pesach preparations on her head, it would be most understandable and expected for her to finally recline on Pesach after all has finally been done! There would be no element of surprise or העתקה at all! So, coupled with the fact that it is not the derech of comfort nowadays, both reasons would have her absolved. While an אשה חשובה presumably had a lot of help around the house, there is no reason to assume she would need to finally rest on the sofa and recline, and therefore, doing so would be a surprise and change, the perfect characteristic of the seder night.
23) To illustrate this, R’ Chaim Kanievsky says that the reason there is no question about the 4 cups, is because it is normal on Yomim Tovim to drink, and so it is no question at all.
24) The Seder Hayom warns how careful one must be in his expression of questions. As a slight nuance makes the difference between the chacham and the rasha! So it bothered me a bit the language we use for the Mah Nishtanah. The Mishnah 116a says כאן הבן שואל which is a very proper way to ask a curious shailah. So why is that we clearly refer to the 4 as Kushyos – טאטע לעבן איך ויל פרעגען די פיער קשיות!
25) The 4 קשיות themselves are not in need of answers! We don’t ask them as true challenges that need clarification. A Yid fregged nit kein kashyas! Rather just one curiosity – a shailah – comes up. What is the one reason we are doing all these four contradictory customs?
26) And truthfully the answer is that all these strange contradictions is is part of the changes we do כדי שישאלו but why?
27) Let us dig a bit deeper into the importance of change on this night. The Gemara 114b clearly states that Karpas as היכירא לתינוקות is not called a Mitzvah. (The fact that R’ Yehudah requires a second dipping as a mitzvah is proof that the mitzvah was not fulfilled earlier due to מצוות צריכות כוונה and he did not mean it for the children to notice.) We also remove the K’ara as a שינוי from the norm. and in Shulchan Aruch these are required but not called a mitzvah. Yet, the halacha brought earlier on 108b, to distribute nuts and treats to keep the children awake so they come to ask questions, is called a mitzvah in Shulchan Aruch 472.16! (The Rambam puts them all together as צריך לעשות שינוי... כיצד..) I would like to suggest, that the keep them up is likened to a הכשר and part of the mitzvah sippur – to ensure they are up to ask so we can answer. However the general שינוים that we do are not just a means to get them to ask to lead into sippur. The changes we make are definitive of the entire character of the night! It is much broader than a specific mitzvah – we change how we do things because tonight IS all about change for the normal. How different tonight is from all the other nights!
28) Why is change so definitive of this night? Yalkut Shimoni bishalach towards the end of 226 brings a similar drush regarding ולא נחם א' דרך ארץ – Derech Eretz is that water comes from above and bread from below, but Hashem brought them water from below and bread from above! – This Medrash shows even more than mentioned earlier. The earlier medrash Rabbah could be understand as simply as instead of Hashem, our Master needing service from us, He gave His service to us. But here we see that in general, Hashem wanted to take the b’nei Yisrael in a manner that is just simply NOT NORMAL. Bread from the sky and water from the rocks below! Just absolute complete changes from the norm.
29) WHY? The medrash continues…כי קרוב הוא – because Hashem is our קרוב. We are “family” with Hashem. Makkas Bechoros and our redemption showed us that WE ARE NOT PART OF GENERAL HUMANITY. We are not homo sapiens! We are בני בכורי ישראל! We are alien to this world! We are superheroes with super human capabilities! WE ARE NOT “NORMAL”! We are a whole entire different breed from the human society at large! And so our birth as a nation was with numerous. needless, absolute changes from the norm.
30) R’ Nachman of Breslov tells a parable of a king and his advisor who became aware of the fact the supply of grain that everyone was eating was causing them to become delirious and to lose their minds. He was concerned that at some point he and his advisor would be identified as the crazy ones since they would be the only ones sane! So he decided to act delirious like them all, but to mark their own foreheads with something noticeable to remind themselves that they are the normal ones. The world around us is delirious and we are a whole different breed. We may act along the lines of the crazy society we live in, but we leave noticeable marks to remind ourselves that were different.
31) R’ Handelsman once came into Yeshivah with a tremendous excitement. He was the target of a minor antisemitic attack with empty soda cans thrown at him. He was exuberant that he was clearly distinguishable as not normal! He is different from society and noticeably so!
32) There is a very strong connection between Tzitzis and the daily Zecher l’yetzias mitzrayim fulfilled alongside it in the last parsha of Shema.
33) The 4 defined lines and borders of the begged tzitzis shows that we live in the confines of society. We live and largely act “in the box”. But the strange strings extend beyond to show that even in the regular hum drum of societal life, at least our minds are not bound. We extend our perception to the ים, רקיע and all the way to the כסא הכבוד.
34) But on the night of Pesach, our Matzos are round. Not just because it works out that way. R’ Shlomoh Kluger held that machine matzos are problematic because they are square! The passuk refers to matzo as עוגות מצות and עוג means circular. One reason for the circle suggests that although there seemed to have been a very clearly defined measure to our gallus – 400 years, only Hashem is חישב את הקץ to us it was like a circle - we could not define the beginning or the end.
35) But perhaps the circle also signifies that WE are not bound by definitive borders! We are truly symbolized by the infinite circle! On the night of Pesach we don’t conform at all to society’s limits! On Pesach we we show that tonight we became and now are OUT OF THE BOX!
36) This is the reason why the pauper is THE QUINTESSENTIAL example and source halacha for Heseibah. Tonight’s NOT NORMAL!
37) This actually is quite definitive of true cheirus itself. It is not simply about an easing of physical hardships and labor. It is about not being bound. To anyone or anything. A person can work extremely hard and still be a free man is he has the ability to quit. And a servant of a king who lives a life of luxury is still bound in slavery so long as he may not quit. Complete cheirus is free of anything that binds our mind and character from true ability to choose to be different. (Interestingly, or cheirus for ultimate bechirah chofshis was brought in tandem with the one time in history that someone lost his bechirah entirely – Pharoah.)
38) We are crazy. We are not bound by norms. We are never stuck. We always can change. Tonight we learn to expect the unexpected. To Question the status quo. To encourage curiosity and creativity and not to be stuck in the past.
39) In summary, heseibah is not primarily about comfort. It is about changing from the bondage of past norms. It calls out thw message of the night. We are not bound! We are never stuck! We can always make new and different choices from the past or from other's expectations. We are truly the only free nation and we are out of this world.
PS - I wonder now if perhaps heseibah was NEVER the normal way to eat. It would seem derech eretz, natural, to eat vertically assisting . Perhaps the whole culture of the wealthy to eat reclining was more of an act of defiance and NOT being bound or succumbing to the expectations of the societal or natural norms.
From <https://d.docs.live.net/8608057176b81e42/OD%20Documents/OD%20dovis%20writings/Shabbos%20Hagadol%205786%20Reclining%20and%20cheirus.docx>