Chayei Sarah – Camels, Chessed vs Gemilus Chassadim

 Chayei Sarah – Camels, Chessed vs Gemilus Chassadim 

The mentioning of the people of חת  ten times is noted in the medrash as a significant "shout out" in recognition of their support of the transaction of a Talmid Chacham; Avraham Avinu. However the mentioning of camels that Eliezer took with him goes almost unnoticed. 

The Kli Yakar does associate the test of Rivkah's Gemilus Chasadim to the camels. Someone who is so enwrapped in being a Gomel Chassadim, would instinctively notice a Gamal since they sound similar. This concept we find elsewhere, like the agalos - wagons - of Yosef hinting to עגל ערופה and the נחש הנחושת  that Moshe made. ((לשון נופל על לשון 

However, I believe that there is a much stronger relationship between the two that extends beyond the realm of just language. 

R' Samson Rephael Hirsch explains that a גמל is the most independent animal, in that it may distance itself from the most life giving element, a source of water, farther and longer than any other creature. Thus its name גמל  connotates something that weaned off from its source, like a toddler weaned off from his nursing mother.

 

The mishnah states that the world stands on Torah Avodah & Gemilus Chasadim. Not Chessed, but Gemilus Chassadim. Let's explain. 

R' Chaim Valozhiner notices that these pillars - represented by the Avos, seem in reversed order. Avraham's chessed should be first, and Yakov's Torah should be last. But, he explains, that once Torah was given it redefined the other qualifications. The original open-ended, never-ending extreme chessed of Avraham Avinu was fine before the Torah was give. But once we have the Torah, Chessed has its rules, guidelines and limitations and priorities as with any other mitzvah. The same applies to Avodah. Previous to the Torah, any avodah would suffice. A bamah, mizbeach, matzeivah, which animals and how or when they were offered was all up to the bal hakorban. But with the Torah came very specific instructions about every detail of korbanos. Hence, the Torah is the pillar that now allows the other two to hold up the world within the Torah's specifications.

This perhaps is why it states specifically Gemilus Chassadim. The truest form of loving-kindness is to give the recipient his own independence and not to feed into his neediness to the point that he remains eternally dependent. Our sages teach us that giving to others should be limited to those who can be expected to at least reciprocate back with a thank you! Giving to one who is not makir tova is not allowed, as giving with no expectations encourages dependency. Gemilus Chassadim is chessed done in a way that allows the recipient to feel independent and weaned off from his benefactor.  

CHAYEI SARAH - FILTERS

CHAYEI SARAH - FILTERS

In the beginning of the parsha we learn of Sarah's death caused by the unfiltered words of the Akeida's news bearer and his awful choice of words caused her death.

R' Yeruchom Levovitz sees this as a very important warning about the potency of one's words. Instead of starting off by saying "I have good news, your son is alive. Now let me tell you what almost happened", for the simple, selfish sake of adding drama to a story a person may sadden, and even shock his listener to death.

 

Eliezer was the Shadchan and we know שקר דובר כסף נוטל. This acronym is not meant to jab shadchanim, rather it is in recognition of their outstanding efforts. The shadchan would love to be totally truthful and it is difficult and unpleasant for them to have to lie. But lie they must. This is actually the whole purpose of a shadchan! To diplomatically make necessary adjustments when the absolute truth would be too much for the other side to initially bear. When Eliezer repeats the story to Lavan he says that when he asked for a drink, Rivkah verbally offered him and his camels as well. This actually was not the case. Only after he finished drinking did she then offer for the cmels. R' Chaim Kanievsky explains that this was adjustmnet from the truth was done smartly by Eliezer, to express such an instinctive level of extreme chessed that Rivkah would immediately offer the camels as well, would be something her family would abhor. - And they would be happy to rid themselves of this goody goody child of theirs!

Perhaps this is why Avraham did not himself go to his own family to arrange the shidduch. If he were to go personally, his other-wordly goodness would turn them off! Similarly, when Rivkah, the ultimate balas chessed first saw Yitzchok it startled her in contrast to her chessed!

 

A shidduch needs a middleman to buffer bold differences and to polish rough edges. That is how shidduchim work.

Chazal teach us that man was created with two barriers on his mouth, his teeth and his lips, to restrain and block from certain types of speech. We may add that here we see another additional layer of protection. Use another filter! A middleman, an editor, another opinion to check the nuances of your language in specially sensitive matters.

החיים והמות ביד הלשון

Chayei Sarah - Middos

 Chayei Sarah - Middos

We find at the end of the Parsha Avraham marries Keturah who Rashi identifies as Hagar. She was called Keturah because  שמעשיה נאים כקטורת. This may be understood as we find one of the ingredients of the ketores was an independently unpleasant spice; the חלבנה. However, together with the other 10 spices he totality of the kitores had an irresistible aroma. So too, the negative aspects of Hagar, upon her return from Egypt to Avraham and his holy ways, were now enhancing the totality of her deeds as her teshuvah reversed her past and she even no carried a new name as the Rambam states in hilchos teshuvah.

However there is something important to note. Even after her return, we still find that all of her offspring did not amount to much. The medrash relates that Avraham even built an iron city for some of them, within which sunlight never shined and he gave over to them the secrets of black magic! What happened to all of Hagar's children?

I believe that this is because only מעשיה נאים . Her deeds were now all good, but her middos remained rooted and were never changed completely or perfected. Like Rashi said last week’s parsha referring to Hagar's return to Egypt, that a thrown branch, returns to its root. The perfection of character to the extent that it becomes part of the person's dna, can have an eternal effect upon his future generations. It is regarding those middos that we call our Avos exactly that - Avos that transfer their character to their offspring. But just because someone has good deeds, that doesn't transfer to the next generation. Only Middos. 

Let's get working. ;-) 

Lech L'cha Hapalit & HaIvri

Lech L'cha  Hapalit & HaIvri

Rashi informs us of Og's sinister intent to have Avraham run to a sure death in war and Og could then take Sarah as his wife. We may ask from where did the medrash extrapolate this idea? Perhaps it is the general approach of חסד לאומים חטאת  - That even the kindness of Gentiles is assumed to be selfishly driven and considered a sin. But precisely this intent seems to be a leap? We also may ask where on earth did Og get the idea that he would be a fitting match for Sarah?

R' Moshe Zakheim asked why is it that Rashi only introduces this intent after telling us a second reason for Og's title here - Hapalit - the refugee of the flood. Shouldn't his intent follow the fact that he ran from the war hoping Avraham would fall? 

Perhaps we can say, that as we mentioned in Parshas Noach, there is stark distinction between how Noach and Og were saved from the mabul. Noach was saved as part of the world community - Hashgacha Klalis. Whereas Og was a true loner, refugee being saved from within the onslaught of the flood itself. This suggests that Og had something very unique about himself that set him apart from Noach - and perhaps aligns him a bit more in relation to Avraham Ha'Ivri. This is why it is here that the passuk says the "palit" came and told the "Ivri". In some way they were both very alone in the world. They were unique and had outstanding qualities that made them both outliers. And so the refugee of the mabul, had thoughts that he might marry the "Ivri's" widow. This also may explain the specific reward for schar p'sios - as a lonely "introvert" for him to go out of his comfort zone, his "daled amos" was a big deal. As was lech l'cha  for Avraham who spent 20 years of his life living in underground tunnels. 

LECH L'CHA Holy Letters and Holy People

 

We find the power of the not so simple letters of the Aleph Beis with Hashem adding a ה  to Avram's name thus enabling him to have children and also editing Sarai's name to allow her as well to bear a child.

The Yalkut Shemoni in the beginning of the parsha states a tradition that we have regarding the 5 double letters; .מנצפך  They are all associated with geulah, a redemption of sorts. Avraham was saved drom Ur Kasdim with the double כ  of . לך לך . Yitzchok was saved from the Philistines with the double מ   of ממנו מאוד. Yaakov was saved from Eisav with the double נ'  of הצילני נא.  And from Egypt we were redeemed with the double פ  of פקוד יפקוד.

What remains is the final redemption of Moshiach represented by the double צ   of צמח....יצמח.

I would like to suggest perhaps a pathway for us to set that in motion. The Torah also has a double צ  in consecutive Roshei Teivos. צדק צדק ירדוף. Perhaps if we can find and chase צדק  all around us by applying בצדק תשפוט עמיתיך, always seeing 'every yid's a big tzaddik' it would ignite the double צ   above as well and bring the final redemption in hastily in our days. 

NOACH WAS A MAN

NOACH WAS A MAN OF…

I  was asked why Noach was tasked with such menial labor. Not only to feed the animals but even cleaning up after them and removing all refuse to the basement! 

Perhaps we may suggest that as many already have said, the world was created to an עולם חסד but over the course of time it became filled with selfish dishonesty and  חמס. The mabul was brought to reset the world upon a renewed footing of עולם חסד יבנה.  But all our successful leaders had a particular attribute that we haven't yet seen expressed in Noach. He was an ISH - which is a title often used to describe an important noble character. Our greatest leaders were all so efective because of their complete selflessness and humbleness. And so although taking care of the animals and the future of all creation was certainly chessed, the ultimate seeds for the new foundations of the world must be sown with humility. Complete, absolute self annulment. This was the avodah of Noach. Not only chessed, but selfless, self depreciating chessed. Perhaps this may also be hinted to as the successful culmination of Noach's mission; וישאר אך נח - He remained "just Noach" - without his previous illustrious titles of Ish, Tzaddik, Tamim. He remained just Noach.

NOACH - TAKE INITIATIVE

את האלוקים התהלך נח - Noach as reactive. He followed his directives. In general perhaps we can understand that his nature was based on Middas Hadin - with finite demands and goals. Those expectations are what guided him. Nature as well can demand of us. (אלוקים  has the numerical value of הטבע  )We have a halacha that from the 15th of Av we are to add to our evenings' learning because the nights begin to get longer. Practically speaking, nowadays, with lights, and standard clocks, we barely notice the new expectations that nature calls upon us until just now as we change the clock. But I'd like to suggest that perhaps the one critique Noach got in the Teivah was from the lion. The very first line in shulchan aruch is a lesson we are supposed to learn from the lion. The gevurah we are to learn from the lion is not that of muscle, but in our character to overcome nature.  The language of the mechaber is is to be like a lion and שיהא הוא מעורר השחר. That we should "awaken the morning". This does not specifically refer to a time to wake up, but to take the initiative and rise not just as a result of the sunshine and the day's demands screaming "get up already"! We should take the lesson from Noach and add at least a bit to our learning already tonight - BEFORE  the change of the clock!

Noach's Produce

Rashi tells us that the main products of the righteous are their own good deeds. But aren't everyone's deeds their main produce?
I believe that perhaps for most people, as they build a family they change focus from their own personal growth to their children's. Their primary purpose and satisfaction often comes their growing family wo hopefully bring them nachas and pride. So their ikar toldos are the children. However, a true tzaddik continues to work on himself so that even throughout the years of raising children, his primary growth in avodas Hashem is always his own work of constant introspection. So fo a tzaddik, his ikkar toldos always remain his own massim tovim.

I just saw  that the anaf yosef on Medrash Tanchumah (Noach 3) brings in reference to this passuk, that whoever fulfills Torah truthfully, is considered as if he creates himself.

Perhaps another approach can be a bit critical. A Tzaddik is not the greatest title although I would wish to be one. But perhaps as just a Tzaddik, a Righteous person who is more meritorious than iniquitous, his main produce is just his own deeds. But a Chassid, an Oved Hashem who goes beyond the letter of the law and above his calling, has a lot more produce than just himself or even his family. Avraham had many נפש אשר עשו and was Av Hamon Goyim! So too all of our Avos and great leaders had multitudes of Peiros well beyond their own self.

BEREISHIS

 

The Chanukas HaTorah explains a perplexing Gemara in Rosh Hashana which relates that ביקש קהלת להיות כמשה But Hashem said  כתוב יושר דברי אמת and in the Torah it says  לא יקום  עוד נביא כמשה. 

He expalins that the sofei teivos of the first few words of the Torah spell אמת. However it was unclear to Shlomo if it begins from the ת  of בראשית  or from the א of ברא. The word bereishis could have been chosen by Hashem  over בראשונה  because it ends with a ת and the following 2 words end with א, מ,   - alluding to a mixed up word אמת - if so, then Shlomoh may say that בראשית is not necessarily hinting to anything else. However Hashem told him, YOSHER divrei emes - spell the word emes straight forward from the sofei teivos of the NEXT 3 words. This leaves the out-of-ordinary, specifically chosen word בראשית for a drashah - and that is, bishvil Mosheh who is reffered to as reishis. This informed Shlomoh that the world was created for the great perfection of mankind who was Moshe, and Shlomo can not assume to be his equal.                                  

By leil slichos we mentioned about the Rambam that states that EVERYONE can be a Tzaddik like Moshe. Which means that each person can push himself to the max and fulfill his mission to perfection. I am sure we all were filled with true feelings of Teshuvah and by the end of ne'ilah certainly commitments were made to reach heights we've fallen short of before.  Now the yomim tovim are over and it is the Reishis of the "real world" once again. The אמת of how realistically they can be incorperated in our lives, suddenly hits. The אמת can easily be out of focus and confusing. The "tough" ת shows up right in בראשית and then word אמת is spelled out of order. We have to look at the word - and shabbos bereishis - differently. Bishvil reishis - focus on the goal. The end. The mission that you understood you can fulfill. How can YOU be like Moshe. Then re-focus the implementation of the steps to get there and THEN אמת will appear in the end, in perfect order.

R' Yeruchom explains, עז כנמר be bold as a leopord to undertakea great goal and purpose, but the approach should be  קל כנשר. The ascent to reach that goal step by step should be light.

Let's be real. Take our Yom Kippur dreams, re-focus and make the אמת happen.   

SHUVAH 85 - VIDUY

 

Shuvah 85 - Viduy

v  Gemara megilla 4a purim on shabbos we speak about purim and we're not concerned that one may bring his megillah. So too, we already had 3 days of aseres yemei teshuvah absent of viduy, we'll speak about viduy.

v  We use a tune... But even litvaks who say zmiros, "zmiros yomeiru”, sing a tune for this? -  viduy yizamru?

v  How should we approach the extensive list of על חטא ?

To search within ourselves for each one or to say it absent mindedly are both not very good approaches.

v  We have to first understand that viduy is a Mitzvah of its own...

Ø  Rambam mitzvah 73 - mitzvah with teshuva... toward end of the mitzvah, he clearly says "it is clear that Viduy is a מצוה בפני עצמה"

Ø  Rambam hilchos teshuva 1.1 when doing teshuvah mitzvah to confess

Ø  Chinuch mitzvah 364 (=10 days after full hebrew year yom kippur = השטן) At time of regret, mitzvah to confess

All this clearly indicates that Teshuvah and viduy are separate things. The TIMING for the independent mitzvah of viduy is when doing teshuvah.

v  So let's understand what each is separately.. Maran asked, to change from sin to keep the mitzvos is certainly not Teshuvah - everyone must keep mitzvos going forward as part of their duty regardless of past. But Teshuva requires long term commitment - as opposed to just the daily kabolas malchus shamayim to follow Hashem's commands that day. Also, teshuvah requires removing oneself from even thinking about the sin going forward.

Ø  Teshuvah at its core may be either regret (R' Yonah) or long commitment (Rambam) but none necessarily incorporate Viduy.

Ø  Minchas chinuch 364.1 Discussing the famous case of the Rasha who betrothed a woman on condition that he is a Tzaddik...Without him saying any verbal viduy, "surely teshuvah alone even internally in the heart... is forgiven.... He is a tzaddik regardless of viduy.... Footnotes bring similarly from Mabit (kiryas sefer) & chelkas Mechokek.

Ø  RCK in derech sicha Nitzavim (pg 614/615) Brings from Ponovezher Rav that the Chofetz Chaim's message to Americans is that Teshuvah is easy. He also then writes that of course teshuvah may be done on Shabbos, regardless of the lack of viduy on Shabbos.

Ø  Another illustration Pninei Hagra ki seitzei 21.22 If there will be in a man a chet deserving of death... By the time he is being brought to be stoned, he certainly regrets his sin, so it is just "חטא" a shogeg - as teshuvah from fear downgrades the sin... - (This was without a viduy)

Ø  From all this we see that viduy is really an entirely independant mitzvah, which is just timed together with teshuvah.

Ø  But even more so, if a person already regretted and committed to improve, he already was forgiven as is a Tzaddik and beloved to Hashem. Then Viduy is completely just "for Hashem" as any other mitzvah - like an esrog! It is not self-serving, nor truthfully bound to any negative, remorseful, painful, difficulty in changing. All that has already been done in teshuva! Viduy then, is entirely a mitzvah of love to Hashem! Of course we should sing and dance with it!

 

v  So let us delve into this new mitzvah...The Rambam (teshuvah 1.1) The time for this mitzvah is any time a person regrets a sin. However, he writes in 2.7 that Yom Kippur is a designated time for everyone to do teshuvah - and say viduy.

Ø  This is actually a Targum Y.B.U. achrei mos 16.31 on yom kippur לפני ה' תטהרו means confess your sins before Hashem and thereby be purified.

Ø  As a matter of fact although the minchas chinuch raises a case in which teshuvah was done for a bitul mitzvas assay (ie: skipped krias shema) without saying verbal viduy, the person has no net gain, since now he is also missing a mitzvas assay of viduy! However, an actual BITUL assay would only apply if viduy was not said yom kippur, which is the Torah's designated time for teshuvah

Ø  So, what is viduy? - Both The Rambam & Chinuch bring that ikkar viduy is אבל אנחנו חטאנו - as is brought from Shmuel in Yoma 87b that when the Chazzan said those words Shmuel rose to a standing position.

Ø  Truthfully though, even just one word is already a viduy and requires standing! Mishnah Berurah 134.4 states that we must stand by the short prayer אל ארך... before taking out the Torah, because the word חטאנו renders it a viduy and requires standing.

Ø  Similarly, in hilchos yom kippur The Mechaber 607.3 tells us that viduy must be said standing. This is a real requirement, and leaning is not permitted.

Ø  Mishnah Berura 10 says that it also should be bowing... This seems to be somewhat of a contradiction...

Ø  But truthfully, the requirement to stand, in itself is quite strange as the actual viduy of yom kipur of Aharon - achrei mos 16.21 - was done while leaning his full weight upon the korban!

So, we must understand this mitzvah better...

v  The source passuk for this mitzvah brought by Rambam mitzvah 73 is parshas Naso (regarding confession upon falsely swearing) והתודו את חטאתם

Ø  Regarding the viduy in the avodah of Yom Kipur, it is interesting to note that at first viduy is referred to as וכפר. As the korban has not been slaughtered yet, this obviously cannot mean כפרת דם but rather ודוי דברים . Why is it called כפרה here but called elsewhere - and even just a bit later, in the confession of sins of all klal yisrael - והתודה?

Ø  R Nissan Alpert notes the distinction but does not offer a clear resolution

Ø  The word והתודה is also strange in the fact that it always appears in the התפעל form (not “he crashed”, but “he go into a crash”) Both the Malbim (naso 5.7.19) and RSRH note the strange language.

Ø  The Malbim (Vayikra 5.5.319) explains the word וידוי itself always represents something that is normally not expressed but remains restrained in the heart. When admitting that someone is right, it is called Modeh or hoda'ah. When admitting that you are wrong it is וידוי and it is ejecting the constrained information, and the person is relieved from that "secret". Hence the expression is always in התפעל.

Ø  RSRH (Vayikra 5.5) says similarly that it is a language of ejection, like מיידה when an item is flung from the person holding it.

Ø  However the use of וכפר for viduy still needs explanation. Kaparah is always with blood on the altar. The Be'er Moshe (last piece in Achrei Mos) says that a Bal teshuvah is like a new person with a new covenant of commitment to Hashem. Just as at Sinai the covenant was with Milah Tevila & Blood, so too the Teshuvah process cuts away from the arlah of the past sin with charatah, Purifies the future with commitment....and Atones like with blood with viduy. However, he doesn’t explain the connection.

Ø  RCK notes that all year we ask סלח לנו and מחל לנו but only on Y.K. we ask כפר לנו. When a person regrets etc.. he is forgiven. Hashem is mochel and He now loves that person as a Tzaddik, but kaparah means to cleanse the stain of sin. Depending on the sin, that needs either YK or a korban's blood, or yissurim etc.

Ø  So how is viduy וכפר - cleansing - like the blood of a korban?

Ø  The Rambam's description of viduy (teshuvah 1.1.) comes from the gemara and includes אנא ה, I sinned, I regret, I commit... but he adds בושתי. It is based on a passuk. But it's interesting that he notes it to be part of a classic viduy.

Ø  I believe the shame is the כפרת דם. And it is because of the בושת in a viduy that it can be called וכפר.

We now see that there are different functions in viduy. Ejection and Shameful transparency.

v  R Moshe Feinstein (kol Ram inyanei yk .6) notes that the Rambam says YK is the time for teshuvah and therefore viduy as well, for everyone. But many people are great Tzaddikim and probably did Teshuvah for their rare sins long before? Also, the avodah of YK required even Aharon Hakohen - and many other great Kohanim gedolim to confess.... upon what?

Ø  I suggest that we see from here the clear reason for the distinction in the Torah's language for viduy. For the Kohen Gadol, it is probably on long gone sins, that are not part of who he is at all. that doesn’t really need mechilah or slicha, it has already been regretted long ago! But kaparah needs yk or דם and that viduy is וכפר because although there is no ejection of a secret sin hiding within, there is still shame about some long-gone sin that is certainly NOT "myself" anymore.

Ø  The fact that shame applies and atones even for long gone sins that are not really part of you anymore is proven from the gemara megillah that thought not to publicly translate the reading of the עגל because it would bring us shame. However, the gemara says that this is specifically why we SHOULD read it, so that the shame will be a kapparah. We see that shame and its related kaparah can be on sins that are quite detached from ourselves - by thousands of years and regret!

Ø  Yet, certainly, the shame of the person who still has a connection to the sin will be much greater. This is expressed in viduy Rabeinu Nissim בושתי וגם נכלמתי כגנב הנמצא במחתרת –

Ø  It is not a coincidence that the passuk (mishpatim 22.1/2) Says אין לו דמים! Perhaps we can explain in drush, that if he was not ashamed to do this, אין לו דמים - and we may kill him. But also, in the next case אים זרחה עליו השמש יש לו דמים. If the robber was ashamed, he has life! Because the glowing shine of shame is a forgiveness for him!

Ø  Rabeinu Yonah (beginning of Iggeres HaTeshuvah) actually uses this exact terminology אים זרחה עליו השמש if the glow of yiras Hashem shines upon a person's face in the expression of... Shame!

Ø  Now we can understand the dual language in the Avodas YK. On the Kohen's confession is says וכפר with the norm that any sin he is saying in his viduy is really long gone and repented for already. It is just embarrassingly stated before G-d. However, the sins of klal yisrael that are confessed upon the Azazel goat, is on sins that are still quite current. And it is expressing and ejecting those dark secrets. Hence, והתודה. Of course, the shame and its related kapparah can be in both cases, but והתודה only applies to the one who is still expelling and ejecting his sins through the viduy.

Ø  This works in perfect tandem with what the Chinuch says in the reasoning for viduy. He gives two! One is to help the process of עזיבה - abandoning the sin for the future. This is a person who is still somewhat attached to his sins. The other is a statement of emunah - I know Hashem knows my sins and thoughts anyway, so I will come forward in shame with them and state them openly.

Ø  The Zohar (3.20a) also describes viduy as an act of open vulnerable transparency – recognizing that nothing can or should be hidden from Hashem.

Ø  This now also explains the seeming contradictory stance of viduy - standing but bowing, and also the huge question we asked from the actual viduy on yk which is done while fully leaning on the goat!

Ø  Most people have both parts of viduy together. Some old past sins that just need the shamefully open statements of viduy called וכפר. And also, the actual expelling and ejection of those hidden things that are still part of us and need ejection. So, we do a blend of both. However, by Aharon they were clearly split. His own far-gone sins had a standing kaparah cleansing through his verbal statements. And Klal Yisrael's sins were expelled and ejected (into the very שעיר!) through והתודה which is done in a broken-hearted way of bowing or leaning something else.

This two factor Viduy can now explain another question that had me perplexed for a long time.

v  We mentioned earlier that we learn from Shmuel that the core of viduy are the words אבל אנחנו חטאנו. I have a problem with 33% of core viduy... Why is אבל part of the core of viduy??? It is just needed for the grammar to continue from what was previously said!

Ø  Perhaps it is not only needed for the grammar of the previous words, but for the forthcoming lengthy and detailed viduy. While we firmly believe as the Ramban told his student, that we are guilty of them all, however without considerable time, focus and self-introspection, we won’t feel regret remorse or commitment on them. It certainly is not והתודה -- an ejection of inner dark secrets, and an empty viduy certainly IS an עזות פנים! So, as we proclaim that we ARE ashamed and not עזי פנים for some sins that we are hopefully acutely aware of, we say אבל - indeed we sinned all of the forthcoming sins. And although they are long gone or forgotten - we are admitting shamefully with full transparency, knowing that Hashem knows them all. We are thus at least fulfilling וכפר and it is not an empty chutzpadik viduy.

Ø  That אבל is what makes the following confession into a valid viduy.

 

v  The tremendous atonement and cleansing power just in the simple honest shameful viduy – regardless of the surrounding components of Teshuvah can be illustrated in a few amazing examples.

Ø  Yalkut Shemoni (Balak) says what a conniving rasha Bila’am was. He knew the power of teshuvah and  that the angel could not touch him if he confesses. So he said חטאתי. Now it is hard to assume Bila’am actually did Teshuvah with regret or commitment – he was still on his way to curse the Jews! But the transparency of honestly, verbally, stating your sin openly is still so powerful!

Ø  Adoni Bezek (Shoftim 1.7) was a horrific Cnaanite king who removed the thumbs and toe thumbs of 70 surrounding kings and had them eating his leftovers under his table. Yet when the Jews did the same to him he said it is because I did this to others that this has befallen me. – and this “viduy” granted him atonement and burial in Yerushalayim!

Ø  There was an infamous informer who was drawn to regret through a one time honest prayer of סלח לנו  one mincha, and after remaining firm not to divulge negative information he was beaten and eventually died. The Rav received a message through she’eilas Chalom that he was atoned for and deserved an honorable levaya…

Ø  The Zohar writes (naso 122a) regarding last week’s parsha הנסתרות לה' that although a person’s Torah and mitzvos may be evident to others, one’s ahava and yirah are הנסתרות לה' – never truly known to others. A person can seem like an infamous informer as he has been for years before. But only Hashem knows of the brief Yirah or Ahava that traversed his heart and brought forth a viduy that can atone.

 

 

v  Let us understand and appreciate the tremendous mitzvah and cleansing power of viduy! Whether for recent sins that we can expel from deep within ourselves with a true remorseful confession, or for long gone sins that are an ancient memory but nonetheless a shameful thing to bring forward.  It is a mitzvah to be joyful for and we should sing it with love!